Archive for August, 2009

Fifteen

Wednesday, August 26th, 2009

The only sour note yesterday was getting my class lists.  I only have two classes this year, and these are about the smallest I’ve ever had: one has seven students, the other eight.  Part of me is angered by this, as I feel I’ve proved my enthusiasm and dedication to the students and administration over and over again – and now I have only fifteen students.

I’m trying to be positive, remembering that I can still make a difference in the lives of fifteen students.  It’s not easy to have a good attitude, especially considering the school actually hired another English teacher this year – I wonder why they didn’t offer the classes to me, when I had been so clear that I wanted more, but I have to believe it’s for the best.

Fifteen students.  Well, if they are fifteen smarter, sharper and curiouser students by the end of the year, I will have done my job.

The First Day of the Rest of the Year

Tuesday, August 25th, 2009

Today was the first day of orientation.  I always leave the first day with my head swimming, full of new information, but three things stood out today:

1) The spiritual connection I feel with my colleagues here is such a great blessing.  I say it often: if I can’t teach at an Orthodox school, I am so happy to be teaching at a Catholic school that is so well-aligned with Orthodox thinking.  They are one of the most conservative groups of Catholics I’ve ever met.  Nearly all come from large, two-parent families, go to confession frequently, and pray before every class.  The first thing we do as a school is attend Mass, followed by a prayer service for the upcoming year, with petitions for students and their families, relatives who are ill, and grace and wisdom for the upcoming school year.  I can’t think of a more unifying, uplifting way to begin this new journey.

2) Everyone looks so relaxed on the first day.  They actually take the time to look into your eyes, ask how you’re doing, and mean it.  By the end of the year, we’re all wound so tightly we almost can’t form a complete sentence in conversation with another adult.  It’s nice to remember that these are real people, with outside interests and families they love.

3) I never thought I could like a principal as well as our departing principal, who was a thoughtful, wise and humble leader.  But this new one won me over in the first five minutes by directly addressing my biggest (and really, only) complaint about my school: The communication here really sucks.   So much that I’m willing to use a vulgarity in describing it.

Well, she began by saying that her personal philosophy can be summed up in one word: Communication.  Almost all problems can be solved through better communication, so it is her goal to communicate as much and as well as possible.  She mentioned a “Friday Memo” that would contain all the upcoming “special events” for the following week – something I’ve been advocating (begging, really) for ever since I first arrived and realized how haphazard communication is.

The amazing thing is that teachers are willing to do almost anything for an administrator, especially one they like.  What they resent is when these duties are thrust upon them with little or no warning.  They also resent what I’ve talked about before: the feeling that all the major decisions are made behind closed doors, regardless of how deeply they are affected by said decisions.  The new principal addressed this as well.

Our new principal also mentioned that she wants to come observe everyone within the first few weeks.  I’ve heard this every year since I’ve been here, and I’ve never been observed except by another teacher.  I hope it happens this year.

Sweetness to the Soul, Health to the Body

Monday, August 24th, 2009

We are proud members of One Straw Farm, a CSA in Baltimore County.  (The owners, Joan and Drew Norman, were featured in Martha Stewart Living earlier this spring, much to our delight.)  Every week for half the year, we split a share of organic vegetables with my parents.  We pay less than ten dollars each for several bags stuffed with fresh produce — this time of year it’s sweet corn, summer squash of all shapes and sizes, baby red potatoes, garlic, watermelon, cucumbers, beets and lots of greens.  The farm is largely responsible for whatever healthy eating habits we have: almost every day I make a salad, throwing in some Amish eggs for protein, for an almost-completely local lunch (the dressing I make from imported oil and vinegar.)  I’m especially a fan of their red cabbage, which puts the dried-out slivers in bagged salad to shame.  Cabbage from One Straw Farm looks like an oil painting and tastes like spicy-sweet heaven.

Last week, when picking up our share, we were told that the farm had been hit hard by a tomato blight that wiped out many thousands of dollars in profit.  The situation was so dire, said the woman who runs our drop site, that if it hadn’t been for the CSA customers (who pay up front for the whole season) the owners might have had to sell the farm.

Overwhelmed by gratitude for these people, who risk their financial health so we can have nice dinners, I wrote them an e-mail.  It was brief; I just told them that they were in our prayers, and ended by saying, “It is an honor to be able to support you in some small way.  The work you are doing — bringing us fresh, healthy, diverse produce — is the greatest on earth.”

(It may sound like an exaggeration, but I swear it’s not.  I’m currently reading In Defense of Food, and it makes me angrier and angrier to see how, as a society, we’ve been tricked into eating substances that are so chemical-laden they can hardly be termed nourishment.  It is such a gift to be able to eat real food.)

I didn’t really expect a response — I know how busy farmers are — but that very afternoon Joan wrote me back, thanking me for the encouragement.  She said that after a tough morning, she had printed my e-mail and taken it out to the field (how’s that for technology?!) where Drew was working.  “I can’t thank you enough,” she said. “He is smiling again.”

Later, Drew wrote me separately:

My morning started with a complaint from a disgruntled customer.  Everywhere I turned, I ran into more headaches. I joke about spending my days putting out fires; as a rule, these fires are easily contained. Other times other times they merge into conflagrations beyond my control. Today I felt like I needed a team of smoke jumpers to rescue me. I believe you may have been that brave soul. Thank you so much for your kind words.

I was so humbled by this exchange.  Humanity is such a mysterious thing.  We can never predict how far the ripples of our words might travel through it.

Six Years Ago Today . . .

Sunday, August 23rd, 2009

. . . was the beginning of something transformative, challenging and beautiful.

Wedding

My husband is wonderful for many reasons, but especially because he pressures cajoles guilts encourages me to write, even when I think I have nothing to say.

Thank you, darling, for believing in me.  Happy anniversary.

New Year, New Challenges

Saturday, August 22nd, 2009

I realized, while I was putting forth my earlier argument for foolish optimism, that I am looking forward to the new school year.  It’s a new year, a clean slate, and there are always changes!

For one thing, my teaching load was cut in half this year.  Teaching electives is wonderful in many ways; the most obvious, of course, is that the students are there because they have chosen the course and thus are ready to learn something about the subject.  There are downsides too, though, and a big one is the lack of consistency.  In addition, high school girls are not known for their intellectual gravity; they will take Jewelry Design and Forensic Biology and whatever else they see glamorized in the media. And finally, my school’s system of course design and selection is about as archaic and irresponsible as I can imagine.  Basically, anyone can design any course if people are willing to take it, and if not enough people sign up for it, it just won’t run that year.

But I’ve had a summer to be reconciled with the current state of affairs, and I’m planning to make the best of it.  I still have two classes in which to corrupt enlighten young minds: SAT Prep, is the first, now in its fifth year.  I will revise and update, of course, and this year I vow to make better notes so I can improve my lesson plans as I go.

The other course I’m teaching is Journalism, which involves the production of the school newspaper.  I’m really looking forward to it.  Tmatt has been kind enough to give me some core teaching points, and I have some ideas about how to structure the class, but I’ll be learning as I go, much as I have done for my whole career.  I think it’s the best way to learn to teach.  If your plans are too rigid, you’ll never be able to reach your students where they are.

Despite my high expectations, my main goal for this school year is actually to dial down the workload.  After our beloved principal was reassigned last spring, I mentioned to her that I’d never had a formal review in my four years there.  She was appalled, and instead of trying to arrange a haphazard one at the last minute, simply told me that she was quite pleased with my teaching and had never seen a reason to interfere with it.  As something for me to think about, she mentioned that there was a tendency among teachers of electives to make their courses too involved; really, electives should be lighter courses, but generally you teach the electives that interest you a great deal, so you assume everyone else is just as interested and wants to work as hard as you do.  She never told me I was one of the culprits, but I know I am.  I just can’t understand why anyone wouldn’t love school as much as me.

So, this year — take it easy, Mrs. Lowe.  The students will thank you.